The other fundamental question which I have not yet answered, and is the first question I ever remember asking my mother, was ‘’who created God?’’. I must have been four because it was after primary school juma. I was in kindergarten and I have very little solid memories other than this from this time period. I remember asking her ‘’Who created Allah?’’ those were the words I used and she said ‘’I do not know”’. It was the first time my mother had said something like that and I remember feeling so shocked that she did not know. It was like a revelation that it was possible for mommy not to know something lol.
And this revelation brings me to the next part of religion that does not make sense; it is incompatible with the dynamic mind. Before asking my mother that question I believed that she knew everything. Her answer to that question changed the way I thought; it taught me something new. I discovered something that I did not believe to be true before that point. I, in that second, learnt that there were some things that mommy did not know. The fact that we can fully believe something to be true in one second and in the very next second fully believe a completely contradicting statement to be true shows us that truth cannot ever be achieved. Maybe I will change my mind on this on day but for pretty much all of my life that is how I have seen it.
When we believe something to be true and we later change our mind about it the feeling of having a new truth is exactly the same of the feeling we got with the old truth so how can we ever be sure that the new truth will not also become an old truth once we discover new information to prove that it is also not true? The point is the nature of our mind is such that it is dynamic and such that there is no difference in feeling between ”lies” that are believed and ”truths” that are believed. So everything you believe to be true now could be a lie and religion refuses to acknowledge this. This is also why I could never consider myself to be an atheist.